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Book Review: Parenting Is Heart Work by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller


Parenting is not for the faint of heart. It's hard work and it's heart work. Some parents are so concerned about how their children behave that they forget to pay attention to what is really going on in their children's hearts. Parenting Is Heart Work is an exceptional parenting book that helps parents see how a heart-based approach works and makes a lasting impact on children's lives. Real change must take place in the heart. Based on Biblical principles, Parenting Is Heart Work gives parents practical ideas to effectively reach, guide, and shape their children's hearts. The book is divided into 4 parts: Understanding the Heart, Connecting with Your Child's Heart, Working Out Heart Change, and Touching Your Child's Heart. At the end of the book, you will find Reader's Guide which includes questions for discussion corresponding to each chapter. Each chapter ends with a prayer. The book covers three main parenting tools: emotional connection, instruction, and correction using Biblical lessons, real-life examples, and valuable strategies. I highly recommend this encouraging & insightful book to all parents. In my opinion, it is one of the very best parenting resources available.

"Commitments provide purpose, meaning, and direction. Without these, the heart lives in continual turmoil, tossed around by fear, anger, or anxiety. Often, a continual problem with negative emotions indicates the need for some major heart work." (p. 29)

"The will is a good thing when it is directed by a wise heart, but a foolish heart creates a lot of pain for both the child and the parents." (p. 57)

"The heart makes commitments, the will makes choices, and behavior is where it all comes out. The heart work, or lack of it, is revealed in behavior, what you see every day in your children's lives." (p. 61)

"Be careful not to teach your children to clean up their behavior only to cover a decaying heart." (p. 63)

"Through the everyday work of child training, parents help children learn that responsibility requires that we do things we don't feel like doing. Those who make decisions based only on how they feel often end up making poor choices." (p. 79)

"A heart that feels loved and secure is better prepared to deal with these difficult aspects of life, but if a reservoir of unaddressed emotion keeps getting in the way, the decision-making process is clouded, and children have a hard time making wise choices." (p. 87)

"Firmness is important with children, but harshness hinders closeness." (p. 105)

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